Monday, August 16, 2010

I Am Truly Moderate

Behold!



I stand at the fulcrum between Michelle Obama and Glenn Beck, Democrats and Republicans, the Haves and Have-Nots, the secular and the religious, the farmers and the bankers, the modern and the postmodern.

If ever there was a man whose opinions should and must be catered to, I Am That Man. I expect to be appeased. I demand satisfaction. My attention is short, my love fickle, my influence unimaginable, and my allegiance easily bought.

First one to buy me ice cream gets my vote.