I Am Truly Moderate

Behold!



I stand at the fulcrum between Michelle Obama and Glenn Beck, Democrats and Republicans, the Haves and Have-Nots, the secular and the religious, the farmers and the bankers, the modern and the postmodern.

If ever there was a man whose opinions should and must be catered to, I Am That Man. I expect to be appeased. I demand satisfaction. My attention is short, my love fickle, my influence unimaginable, and my allegiance easily bought.

First one to buy me ice cream gets my vote.

My List of Petty Personal Vendettas Grows Ever Longer

Go fuck yourself, George Will.

And should be recognized as such

You cunning worker, Daedalus!
Inventing something new
Of wax and feather stitched together
You fashioned them and flew
Above the foaming wine dark sea
Below the sun and sky
But sons are harder things than wings
To craft after they die